Today’s blog jumps around a bit - my brain is gone. Just a warning…
Super big thank you to DBR’s Auntie and Uncle for the awesome birthday party they threw him last Saturday. DBR loved his gifts and he really enjoyed getting together with everyone. We really enjoyed watching all the little feet and seeing the smiles on everyone’s faces. The males all had a hoot playing football and I’m sure I wasn’t the only wife running out to grab A5-35 and hot packs that evening! Our Dadums was “feeling the burn” the next day, that’s for sure. K&R put on a great party and K has been the most awesome Auntie since July 13, 1989. I know she will forever hold a special place in our kidlets’ hearts. Thanks again! As my favourite speaker is wont to say, the family gathering “got me to thinking…” (Really missing your emails, by the way Kev!)
When attending family gatherings, we are reminded of many things – good, bad and otherwise. It started with one niece teasing the other about her fat tummy, which led Auntie Lala (yup, that’s me) to remind both nieces that how our outsides look can't speak to what our insides are all about. Where did that come from, those who are most around the children? While some of us make bad choices with foods and exercise options (or lack thereof), others obviously think we haven’t noticed this and are considerate enough to point it out. They must think we don’t notice when our clothes are tight or we have to buy a larger size - ya think? We LIVE with these bodies – all the time! What part of looking in the mirror do you think we don’t get? What effect does it have on someone and their self-esteem when there are comments made about weight - “You’ve lost weight? You mean you were BIGGER?” – that was my favourite. Blatant stares and comments whispered behind raised hands really help everyone to feel loved and accepted. It is sad that one's views come out in this way. I was reminded about not making time for some we know, had cookies removed from my reach I presume because someone was bothered by my obvious change in appearance since last we saw each other, was asked if my hair wasn’t “a bit too dark” and learned that “you will regret not seeing others when you get older and more time has passed.” Being opinionated myself, I believe I understand why the comments were made whether I agree or disagree. Do any of these things really matter? No. What matters to me is I have a husband to continue to build a relationship and home with and three teens who are all trying to figure out their own answers to life’s questions and who are trying to become more independent while still being sheltered and protected by the folks. We have activities and events and happenings – there is always something. I choose to spend the most time with those people who I like and who I have most in common with (PEANUT BUTTER!), with those people who share some of my thoughts and feelings and values and morals. I choose to pass along those things to my kids and their friends that come to our house. (It would be great to see more good being instilled in other people’s kids, but given how some parents are raising kids we’ll be seeing a LOT more reality shows like Brat Camp.) I digress yet again.
Do I make enough time for the important things in my life? Well, what are the important things in my life? Dadums, DBR, KVS, BDJ, friends and acquaintances, of which I would have to include a good number of my relatives. Just like with friends, there are family members you stay in closer contact with than others – because of distance or interests or availability or whatever – so some family are ‘friends’ while others are definitely more ‘acquaintances’. How would I differentiate between the two? If you get a warm hello and sometimes a hug then you’re definitely a friend. If we exchange pleasantries and talk about the people we’re related through, then we’re more acquaintances. Doesn’t that make sense? While everyone has an impact on us and affects our lives, as we make choices that bring change into our lives the priorities can’t help but change as well. I remember when Dadums and I had our three kids and were struggling – there were those who understood what we were going through (my macaroni and wieners friend who I spent a lot of time with when my kids were toddlers) and there were some who had no flippin’ idea either because of age or not having had children of their own.
As we reach the same age and stages as others, there is a better understanding of what the other has gone through. However, it is important to take into account one’s choices and circumstances and how they obviously affect things. The choices we make affect our life stages and experiences: There is a difference between having your kids at 20 or 30, there is a difference between having a healthy body and abusing your body, there is a difference between working hard during your youth so you may enjoy your senior years and choosing not to work and struggling through your golden years. Right now our family’s choices mean our lives are busy with things that involve our kids and work and home and pets. We continue to make choices based on the wants and needs, and I think we live comfortably because of the choices we’ve made. Good, bad or otherwise, we have mostly bettered ourselves throughout the years, bearing in mind we have had a little help - thanks bunches BK Dad. We know some who still live off their parents and others who live off their kids, but I think we have done well and maintain ourselves without too much difficulty. Does this mean we always make the right choices? No, not always. We make choices that we really didn’t have to that and that end up costing us shit loads of money (separations, electronics, vehicles and other possessions) and we typically live outside our means, but we are quite proud of the fact that we’ve mostly done it on our own. We have had a couple of big boosts that certainly helped - thanks bunches Dad for all you’ve to help us make a home. Other money that results from the death of a loved one is just different. It’s still money and you still use it, but it means you’ve suffered a loss in order to get that – and it doesn’t ease the pain. Others may disagree with me on that, especially those who don’t really have any money and are trying to get some through whatever means – but those are my feelings. I know that we make enough money that we should have a lot more put away, but we choose to enjoy our money now and face the consequences later. I think too many of us do that, as too few save! We know some whose parents have paid off their mortgage now rather than after they die, so that the kids could enjoy their kids and life rather than worrying about the cost of a mortgage. However, when I think of that I am also very proud of the fact that we are paying the mortgage on our wonderful home and that we have reliable vehicles and that we work hard for all of the things we have! Thank you Dadums’ (and Momums’ too) for working so hard to keep us in the lifestyle we’re used to. Remember kids, if you do a Grade C job then you will have a Grade C living. If you do a Grade A job, then you will have a Grade A living. (I do believe that’s a Dr. Phil-ism, but I can’t find reference to it on his website.)
So, in the end, do I make time for what matters? Yes, I think so. I’m happy with my life right now. I’m becoming a better person, who listens more and tries to be more considerate to those I love most. I am trying to stay healthy and hopefully something will ‘click’ soon and I’ll get back on the exercise band wagon (yeah – like you didn’t know the elliptical wasn’t going well by my rant above – LOL). I am looking forward to seeing old friends (KCDJR) in a few days and hearing all about KVS’ Trainers Course with the Rams today, and Dadums’ day at work and spending time snuggling tonight and maybe watching a movie. That’s my tantrum for today - I'm spent.
Toodles!
Next topic? Spirituality or lack thereof.
Super big thank you to DBR’s Auntie and Uncle for the awesome birthday party they threw him last Saturday. DBR loved his gifts and he really enjoyed getting together with everyone. We really enjoyed watching all the little feet and seeing the smiles on everyone’s faces. The males all had a hoot playing football and I’m sure I wasn’t the only wife running out to grab A5-35 and hot packs that evening! Our Dadums was “feeling the burn” the next day, that’s for sure. K&R put on a great party and K has been the most awesome Auntie since July 13, 1989. I know she will forever hold a special place in our kidlets’ hearts. Thanks again! As my favourite speaker is wont to say, the family gathering “got me to thinking…” (Really missing your emails, by the way Kev!)
When attending family gatherings, we are reminded of many things – good, bad and otherwise. It started with one niece teasing the other about her fat tummy, which led Auntie Lala (yup, that’s me) to remind both nieces that how our outsides look can't speak to what our insides are all about. Where did that come from, those who are most around the children? While some of us make bad choices with foods and exercise options (or lack thereof), others obviously think we haven’t noticed this and are considerate enough to point it out. They must think we don’t notice when our clothes are tight or we have to buy a larger size - ya think? We LIVE with these bodies – all the time! What part of looking in the mirror do you think we don’t get? What effect does it have on someone and their self-esteem when there are comments made about weight - “You’ve lost weight? You mean you were BIGGER?” – that was my favourite. Blatant stares and comments whispered behind raised hands really help everyone to feel loved and accepted. It is sad that one's views come out in this way. I was reminded about not making time for some we know, had cookies removed from my reach I presume because someone was bothered by my obvious change in appearance since last we saw each other, was asked if my hair wasn’t “a bit too dark” and learned that “you will regret not seeing others when you get older and more time has passed.” Being opinionated myself, I believe I understand why the comments were made whether I agree or disagree. Do any of these things really matter? No. What matters to me is I have a husband to continue to build a relationship and home with and three teens who are all trying to figure out their own answers to life’s questions and who are trying to become more independent while still being sheltered and protected by the folks. We have activities and events and happenings – there is always something. I choose to spend the most time with those people who I like and who I have most in common with (PEANUT BUTTER!), with those people who share some of my thoughts and feelings and values and morals. I choose to pass along those things to my kids and their friends that come to our house. (It would be great to see more good being instilled in other people’s kids, but given how some parents are raising kids we’ll be seeing a LOT more reality shows like Brat Camp.) I digress yet again.
Do I make enough time for the important things in my life? Well, what are the important things in my life? Dadums, DBR, KVS, BDJ, friends and acquaintances, of which I would have to include a good number of my relatives. Just like with friends, there are family members you stay in closer contact with than others – because of distance or interests or availability or whatever – so some family are ‘friends’ while others are definitely more ‘acquaintances’. How would I differentiate between the two? If you get a warm hello and sometimes a hug then you’re definitely a friend. If we exchange pleasantries and talk about the people we’re related through, then we’re more acquaintances. Doesn’t that make sense? While everyone has an impact on us and affects our lives, as we make choices that bring change into our lives the priorities can’t help but change as well. I remember when Dadums and I had our three kids and were struggling – there were those who understood what we were going through (my macaroni and wieners friend who I spent a lot of time with when my kids were toddlers) and there were some who had no flippin’ idea either because of age or not having had children of their own.
As we reach the same age and stages as others, there is a better understanding of what the other has gone through. However, it is important to take into account one’s choices and circumstances and how they obviously affect things. The choices we make affect our life stages and experiences: There is a difference between having your kids at 20 or 30, there is a difference between having a healthy body and abusing your body, there is a difference between working hard during your youth so you may enjoy your senior years and choosing not to work and struggling through your golden years. Right now our family’s choices mean our lives are busy with things that involve our kids and work and home and pets. We continue to make choices based on the wants and needs, and I think we live comfortably because of the choices we’ve made. Good, bad or otherwise, we have mostly bettered ourselves throughout the years, bearing in mind we have had a little help - thanks bunches BK Dad. We know some who still live off their parents and others who live off their kids, but I think we have done well and maintain ourselves without too much difficulty. Does this mean we always make the right choices? No, not always. We make choices that we really didn’t have to that and that end up costing us shit loads of money (separations, electronics, vehicles and other possessions) and we typically live outside our means, but we are quite proud of the fact that we’ve mostly done it on our own. We have had a couple of big boosts that certainly helped - thanks bunches Dad for all you’ve to help us make a home. Other money that results from the death of a loved one is just different. It’s still money and you still use it, but it means you’ve suffered a loss in order to get that – and it doesn’t ease the pain. Others may disagree with me on that, especially those who don’t really have any money and are trying to get some through whatever means – but those are my feelings. I know that we make enough money that we should have a lot more put away, but we choose to enjoy our money now and face the consequences later. I think too many of us do that, as too few save! We know some whose parents have paid off their mortgage now rather than after they die, so that the kids could enjoy their kids and life rather than worrying about the cost of a mortgage. However, when I think of that I am also very proud of the fact that we are paying the mortgage on our wonderful home and that we have reliable vehicles and that we work hard for all of the things we have! Thank you Dadums’ (and Momums’ too) for working so hard to keep us in the lifestyle we’re used to. Remember kids, if you do a Grade C job then you will have a Grade C living. If you do a Grade A job, then you will have a Grade A living. (I do believe that’s a Dr. Phil-ism, but I can’t find reference to it on his website.)
So, in the end, do I make time for what matters? Yes, I think so. I’m happy with my life right now. I’m becoming a better person, who listens more and tries to be more considerate to those I love most. I am trying to stay healthy and hopefully something will ‘click’ soon and I’ll get back on the exercise band wagon (yeah – like you didn’t know the elliptical wasn’t going well by my rant above – LOL). I am looking forward to seeing old friends (KCDJR) in a few days and hearing all about KVS’ Trainers Course with the Rams today, and Dadums’ day at work and spending time snuggling tonight and maybe watching a movie. That’s my tantrum for today - I'm spent.
Toodles!
Next topic? Spirituality or lack thereof.
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